Pay your dues

Its all about respect and putting in time. Everyday, I hear... "pay your dues," "stick it out for a year or two," or "just get the experience and move on." I get it! No one becomes a director in a week or a university president in a year. But to limit someones voice and invalidated their lived experiences is another thing. Yes, I am a graduate student, but I also have life experience, a commitment to social justice, passion towards assisting students and a never-ending hope that education moves are people forward.

My idea on paying your dues...If I want to become a doctor, I don't mind sweeping the hospital floors, if I know the overall experience would be beneficial. But, it seems like i'm taking out the trash and will never be seen as a potential physician... I am a humble person, hard to believe, I do not think any task is menial, I am above nothing. I believe in the "I wouldn't ask someone to do something, I wouldn't do" philosophy. In my practice, I give max effort and energy. As of late though, the work I do doesn't motivate me, the environment I work in is drastically change from what I once knew it as, and I feel it deteriorating my work-ethic and "spirit."


Bottom line, my goal in life is to improve society and help my community overcome obstacles and empowering them to achieve their dreams. This can take on many forms, but I have chosen progressing my community through educational outreach. I Know that education is the greatest transformative agent in society. With that being said, I have no problem, being in an entry-level position for years, doing what I LOVE. I have no issue "paying my dues" and putting in years of effort to progress my aspirations.

I am free willed, an independent thinker, and hate hierarchical structures. I need to move forward and find an environment the feeds into my passion and helps me progress.


Where are you in your life? What aspirations do you still seek? Have you been complacent in life? Are you moving forward and following your dreams? What hinders you from being successful? What do you want to accomplish next?

These are questions I will ask myself to continual self-assess my progress in life. Helping me reflect on where I've been and where I want to go.

Jungle Cruise

So I just returned from a great weekend of visiting family and friends. Friday was dedicated to my grandparents and chilling with them was awesome! I love hang out with my family, retracing my roots, and slowing life down. Saturday was all about the college buddies and fraternity brothers. JHAB, was awesome and it was great to reconnect and see the progress my friends have made since graduating college. Today was spent on quality time with my younger brother, which included hanging out at the happiest place on earth, Disneyland! Pretty tired from the drive back, but decided to write a quick post.

So a couple things have been running through my mind. First, the idea of "success as the best type of revenge." Think about it... everyone in their life, some more than others, have been disregarded, underestimated, over-looked, doubted or been told you "you cant do that" or "you will never become that." The black child who tells his doctor he wants to be just like him, just to get told "you'll never be one." Later on in life, that same boy becomes a world-renowned physician. Or a peasant women from the fields of Guatemala, being underestimated/disregarded for being a women. Deprived of schooling, she self educates and wins a Nobel peace prize. Even in my community, kids being told the wouldn't make it in life, they should drop out, sell drugs or join the military. They turn around, deny the haters their pleasure and become college graduates! The resiliency of these types of people is astounding! I have also found myself standing victorious over my nay-sayers and doubters, and it feels great. I am realizing the best response to oppressive/negative ill-will is success. It is the the power to overcome all the doubts and succeed; surpassing expectation and crushing peoples hopes for your failure. If you are reading this, I am sure you have had a situation or experience you can relate to. How great does it feel when you prove someone wrong? I equate that feeling to stick my middle fingers in the air and saying "look at me now, puto!" Okay, I know its not proper to flip someone off or taunt or say "puto," but that is the feeling I get. Middle Fingers in the air, asking people to keep doubting me, because they only fuel my drive and success.

And the second idea floating around my mind is having the "fear of failure, fueling your success"... Goodnight y'all, keep living that West LA lifestyle!

Change the Channel!

There are some movies for me, that I hate to watch. I dislike the anxiety I get from anticipating "that scene." The intense scene, the death scene, the seen you wish could have an alternate version. Some films, I hate to watch because I know what happens next, but wish I could change, but know I cant.

In those particular movies, the scene is as raw and new has the first time I experienced it....

Independence Day: When the crazy dad, who was always ridiculed for believing in aliens, sacrifices himself to save the world, his family and flies his plane into the spaceship.

RENT: When 'with out you' plays you know that Angel's death is next. Angel is my favorite character: young, loving, Latino...but his death is untimely, reminding us 'life is short, do not put off your dreams...'


What movie(s) makes you feel the way I do?

If you dont love me, let me go...

So today has been a long day of research, reading, and reflection. I started off with doing my Professional Competencies research....that went well. Then I moved on to my research on racial microaggression and it led me to do a quick analysis of twitter and the overtly racist/prejudice tweets easily accessible on the site. Now, I am just reflecting on myself, my practice, and my life. I have always been an advocate of stereo therapy or just listen to music to make you feel better. Listening to a specific track can make me happy, make me remember good times or take me back twelve years. Music, its melody and lyrics, has the power to take you back in time, relive great or negative experiences, but overall music has the power to make you feel good. So either play a song with your earphones or blast the volume on your speakers and sing off the top of your lungs. Do it, it will make you feel great!


This blog will be a continuous blog, that includes a collection of verses that make me remember, relive, or reflect. I encourage you to comment and share what lyrics move you.


First Five:
The Decemberists: The Engine Driver
And if you don't love me let me go
I am a writer, writer of fictions
I am the heart that you call home
And I've written pages upon pages
Trying to rid you from my bones

Brand New: Okay I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don't
i am heaven sent,
don't you dare forget.
i am all you've ever wanted,
what all the other boys all promised.
sorry i told. i just needed you to know.

Kanye West: Tell Everyone you Know
Babygirl I'm finished
I thought we were committed
I thought we were cemented
I really thought we meant it
Cause we were once a fairy tale
But this is farewell

Notorious B.I.G.: Juicy
We used to fuss when the landlord dissed us
No heat, wonder why Christmas missed us
Birthdays was the worst days
Now we sip champagne when we thirst-ay
Uh, damn right I like the life I live
'Cause I went from negative to positive
And it's all good...

Wicked: Defying Gravity
Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes and leap

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down...

TSwift

Just an update

I was updating my Ed-Join.org profile and I came across the job description of 'Outreach Community Liaison.' Being in a position like that would be making up for all the opportunities my friends/students lacked growing up in Anaheim. I don't wanna be a "Catcher in the Rye" but this job is a difference maker, at least in its description. Helping at risk students stay on track to go to college, graduate HS, or just escape the streets, what more could a person ask to do in life?. The more and more I think about it, I love the K-12 System. Especially now with this "race to the top," we need people who will still focus on those students/schools that are left behind, the ones who are underestimated and misunderstood.

Job Description
Assist with the identification of the District’s at-risk students and recommend District schools and/or alternative education programs which would best serve the student’s individual education needs.

Communicate with each school in the District regarding attendance problems including no-shows, forty-five day referrals and other specific cases; work cooperatively with school, community and District personnel.

Oversee the operating procedures of the Outreach office and assign work to others as assigned by the position.

Maintain open communication with various community agencies and with local community centers; maintain current knowledge of gang awareness programs and gang prevention.

Locate and refer students on the street back into school.

Meet with and apprise the site administrator of daily activities; assist the site administrator in controlling potential issues as necessary.

Monitor, instruct and conduct negotiations with pupils, parents, administrators and others.

Assist with in-service of intern social workers.

Drive a personal vehicle to make home visits as necessary.


Minimum Qualifications
Graduation from high school supplemented by specialized training in working with high risk students and two years of experience dealing with high risk students in an educational institution.

Hello, My Name is Earl

So, lately I've been getting feedback about my personality and approachability. This is something I have work hard on for the last four years. I use to acknowledge that I was stoic and displayed a detachment form emotions, but now I understand that is not the best way to be. As always, I acknowledge my flaw and working on becoming a better version of me.

I don't want to be bubbly, but I also don't want to seem unapproachable or unhappy. Peoples feedback is usually "smile more," "show off your personality" or "its okay to show a piece of yourself, you don't always have to try to be perfect... let people see your cracks." I think I have had enough feedback to realize that I am not the most approachable person and that my personality doesn't send rays of sunshine. I am a happy person, I think I am a very social person, but I also tend not to invest "myself" easily. Time to move forward...

"I'm just trying to be a better person" -earl hickey